More than five years ago I received the most devastating call that my precious son was not doing well and I needed to abort. I was around 16-18 weeks. It was just devastating.
I went into see my OB-GYN for follow-up ultrasounds and blood work to confirm their findings, and all tests came back stating that my son had this debilitating disease and that I needed to abort immediately.
But something in me said I needed to see my son, I needed to hold him if even for just a moment. Each visit, each follow-up, the news was confirmed or more markers were found in different areas of his body.
I was determined that regardless of their findings I was not going to murder my son. He still kicked and flipped inside me letting me know, “mommy I’m here, I’m fine.”
I was sent to see advanced ultrasound technicians, doctors who could see and study the heart and brain in utero and I was still getting confirmations of their findings but I still was yet determined to keep my son. I did my own research to find that I could ask for an amniocentesis to test my son’s waters and that would be a surefire way to get 100% findings. When I asked, I was told it would be pointless as the images don’t lie and I had seen multiple technicians as well as a geneticist.
I finally got my doctors to agree to me doing the amnio but only if I had seen yet one more specialist to confirm their findings of which I did: a heart doctor that specialises in testing of the foetus while in utero and this is where I got my breakthrough.
The heart specialists advised me before even laying a finger on my belly that many, many doctors are frightening mothers into aborting for Trisomy 18 when in fact parents are carrying healthy children. Without testing me, he said he could tell me my pregnancy was normal. Sure enough, there were no markers, no brain or heart defects; a perfect, healthy little boy.
I still did the amnio as I had requested for peace of mind. I waited two agonising days for my results and yet again my son was and is healthy. No signs of Trisomy or any health concerns for that matter and I delivered a healthy 71b 9 oz baby.
After my delivery I emailed a picture of my beautiful boy to each and every doctor, geneticist, as well as technician, letting them know I had a safe pregnancy and delivered my sweet pea healthy and bouncy. No one ever replied or apologised.
With that being said I feel that these doctors need more training and if it’s not training they need it’s probably a syndicated plot for a certain amount of children not be born or they receive payments for unnecessary testing.
To all the expectant moms: keep the faith, don’t give up the fight for your children, for no one else will. I am a living testament to that.
Although my fight was years ago, I still from time to time do research on T18 because I want to know how I could be given such treacherous reports and told to do the unthinkable for no reason. I am finding that many more parents are being put through this torment and something needs to be done about it. Again, my advice to all parents on this platform: Although your babies are still in utero they are your babies, your children. They need a voice and that voice is yours. Keep your babies. Do all the necessary testing and see all the doctors. Do your research and don’t be bullied.
– by Sandra Sharlene.